Unfortunatly while many focuse on the patience of collars, they miss the patience of learning your way, when many of us began in this lifestyle, there were elders, you went through training or mentorship and when your mentor felt you were ready, they discussed it with some others and then you were "allowed" to make the cycle of the community and find a submissive/slave, now anyone can read a website, buy a flogger and go to town as a Dominant, it leads to a far different lifestyle than it once was, and it leads to far more emotional damage being done to beginning Dominants and submissives.

Patience is a great virtue, and Dominants need it as well as submissives, to make sure they are "relationship ready" before they settle into playing with or establishing an ongoing relationship with someone.

Submissives need to think to their own safety, do you play with the Dominant who has 1 year in the lifestyle and no training or mentor?

As a general rule employers will consider 3 years experience as worth 1 year of education, and most of the trained or mentored Dominants out there have a minimum of 2 years training, which would put them at the level of 5 or 6 years for self-taught people, with far fewer victims of screw-ups in their wake as well.

We all make mistakes and we all continue to learn, even those of us that have been in this long enough to remember when the big names started, but we have to be willing to learn, and grow, and sometimes that is by taking a chance, and sometimes by doing the right thing and saying "I am not ready to play, I need to learn first." And play is not the best way to learn oftentimes.

15 May 2007 11:10:17


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