The nature of play

Why do we play, what do we get from it? Is it responsible to play with just anyone however we feel like?

In most cases the type of play we do, results in activation of the natural fight or flight instinct, releasing endorphins into our body, which have various effects on us, including pain relief, increased dopamine production, increase the feeling of general well being, reduce our ability to concentrate, endorphins also activate our addiction centers, we want more and more.

When those endorphins leave our system, we feel drained, depressed, and looking for our next dose, or next high.

So, as a responsible top, what should I do? I make sure not to play with anyone without discussing it before hand, and make sure I am going to be available to the bottom to discuss things afterwords for hours or days after the play, I am also going to make sure the bottom comes down slowly after the play.

But so many in this lifestyle play casually, no regard for the effects it has later, treating bottoms and subs as toys to be used and disposed of when they are done.

I have seen much over the years, dominants who will jump on the new submissive, before they know much, get them hooked on the addicting play, use them a bit, and quit, the victim then moves on to the next dominant willing to play, never building a true relationship, just bouncing play partner to play partner, the dominants do the same, victim to victim. Only years later when they look back do they realize all they wasted, all the damage they did, and then they regret it.

But we are dominants, we are never wrong, or are we playing our fiddle while Rome burns around us?

8 May 2007 16:11:44

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